Achieving The Magic Of Making Up

The magic of making up is sweet when it happens. But how do we achieve this sweetness? What is an effective apology? What does making up entail?

One thing's for sure - Just saying the word sorry is not enough. Sorry is just a word. Your (ex) partner needs to know you mean it. Let's assume here you're the one in the wrong re something you said or did.

Now the first temptation is to go talk to your (ex) partner and share all that you feel with them. But stop yourself! This is where you need to cool off a bit, and take the pain. Don't do anything rash like arguing, texting constantly or phoning all the time. They won't appreciate that.

Remember that whilst in this case you are the one being dumped, it has still not been easy for your partner to break up with you by any means. In fact, it was probably just as tough.

So back to the question: what is an effective apology? Well, an effective apology must be, above all, sincere. An apology that isn't genuine will kill any magic of making up and will likely not lead to reconciliation.

It isn't hard to differentiate between an insincere and a sincere apology. Let's look at an example.

Here's a fairly sincere apology: "Darling, I'm so sorry. You were totally right and I feel ashamed. I really would like to repair the damage I've done."

Now let's add one little word and change this apology slightly as per what people often say in such circumstances, and then we'll see how sincere it still sounds.

"Darling, I'm so sorry. You were totally right and I feel ashamed. BUT you've got to admit, it wasn't all my fault. You had something to do with the way I behaved."

That one little word "But" just made your apology into an insincere one. It implies that you actually don't think it was your fault and really you're just blaming them. This is not sincere and will only continue the problems. 

The Magic Of Making Up will count for nothing if you don't get the apology right, so before you make the apology, think about your level of sincerity.

For more insights about the magic of making up click HERE